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Tuesday, 22 August 2017

Day 2268 - Low in High-School - November'll spawn a monster

IT'S COMING, IT'S COMING, IT'S COMING!

It has today been announced by the ExecutiveVice President of BMG, Korda Marshall, that his company have signed Morrissey, and will be releasing a new album called Low in High-School on November 17th. I am so excited I could wee my pants... in fact, I actually think that a little dribble may have just escaped.

The announcement also states the following:

1. Low in High-School will be released on CD, coloured vinyl, limited edition cassette and digitally - who the bleeding hell plays cassettes? No wonder it's limited.

2. BMG also partnering Morrissey on the launch of his new label, Etienne Records - I'm not sure if this means that Low in High-School will be on Etienne, or if BMG will be helping with the re-release of WPINOYB.

3. The new LP was recorded at La Fabrique in France and Forum Studios in Rome

4. Low in High-School captures 'the zeitgeist of an ever-changing world.' - Now then, if that quote has come from Morrissey, which I suspect it has, then the use of the word 'zeitgeist' is very interesting indeed. It was a word used in Our Mozzer's parody piece, 'Review of the Reviewers', written following the release of Morrissey's Autobiography. Coincidence? Of course! OM also used the word zeitgeist whilst describing Bieber in The Arms in June 2014.

5. There are likely to be tour dates to promote the record, but at the moment only one show is booked - Hollywood Bowl on November 10th.

I absolutely love the title of the album, and would imagine that there must be a song on the same theme as The Headmaster Ritual.

Korda Marshall - who only four days ago announced that BMG had signed Boy George - said of the signing of Morrissey, "There are not many artists around today that can compare to Morrissey. He is an extraordinary talent. He is prodigious, literate, witty, elegant and above all, courageous. His lyrics, humour and melodies have influenced many generations. The music on this landmark record will speak for itself and we are delighted to welcome him to BMG." - FUCK STEVE BARNETT AND FUCK HARVEST - MORRISSEY IS BACK!
Image result for korda marshall
KORDA MARSHALL

If Korda Marshall means what he says, then it would appear that Morrissey has at last found someone who understands. This is a new dawn.... Dear Korda, DO NOT FUCK THIS UP!

Meanwhile, back in The Wrong Arms, Morrissey has been seen more regularly in recent days. Here are his offerings:

SATURDAY 19TH:
12.30pm - Played In The Ghetto by Elvis Presley on the jukebox

SUNDAY 20TH:
2.30am - "I'm not what you please, need or think."
2.03pm - "Hassle and tassle."
8.23pm - "Emptiness consumes me."
8.25pm - "Each morning I'm an optimist, and by the evening I'm a realist once again."
8.32pm - "I have come to the conclusion that travel does change people, if only because one ages seven years each time one passes through an airport."
8.36pm - "I often think I was made for twitter. I have little to say - and less space to say it."
8.40pm  - (following on from posting three retweets of his own tweets from May) "Retweeting oneself is the narcissist's solution to twitter boredom."

8.44pm - (In reply to Heather tweeting to say that she liked to see the classic OM tweets) -
"Vintage OM."
"Quintessential OM perhaps?"
8.56pm - "I am quite brash."

Related image


MONDAY 21ST:

11.45am - "If only one could press mute in reality."
11.50am - "Sadness is the rhythm of my life. Sadness is to loneliness as comfort is to company."
11.52am - "Things could be worse. I could be being interviewed by @wossy."
11.58am - "Is guilt ones true pain?"
12.00pm - "All typos are due to Admin bods and their ridiculously fat fingers."
12.06pm - "Vanity is my one true pleasure."
12.12pm - "Does anything need to make sense? It's all absolutely pointless to me."
12.27pm - (In reply to EARS suggesting things get easier as one matures) "The self obsession decreases, however the observations increase. A vicious circle of despair."
12.42pm - Played Lost by Morrissey on the jukebox
9.56pm - (In reply to Manclad tweeting to say that Mike Joyce was sat near to him at last night's Man City match) "Give him my worst."
9.57pm - (In reply to a random tweet by someone called @Bee_896, who had tweeted, "Sometimes I wish Morrissey had twitter, his tweets would be gold") "Gold yes. Followers no."

TODAY:
12.02am - (In reply to Heather replying to the above tweet saying, "Hidden gold - the best kind") "Not hidden. Lost"
5.54pm - Played So High by Elvis on the jukebox


For the record, Morrissey (@TrueMorfessa) currently has 89 followers. I agree with Heather, it is hidden gold.

Morrissey has made no statement himself about his new record, but we do now know that he is currently in Switzerland, as he has issued a statement via nephew Sam's Facebook page regarding the passing away of comedian, Dick Gregory, and signed it off - Morrissey Switzerland.

I received a strange Twitter DM message from Morrissey on Saturday night which read, "I've come to a conclusion which part of the world bores me immensely." He didn't add any more, so was this his way of telling me that he is in Switzerland, and that the place now bores him?

I also had a DM message on Sunday instructing me to, "Delete Chuck. Lifetime ban." Chuck's recent comments on FTM questioning Morfessa's authenticity had obviously annoyed him. I deleted them.

And finally for today, the new Wrong Arms/BRS Chart was counted down on Sunday by Bitchy Bobby Neville. Here is the TOP 3:

1. THE NATIONAL FRONT DISCO - MORRISSEY (RE-ENTRY)
2. JUST COULDN'T RESIST HER WITH HER POCKET TRANSISTOR - ALMA COGAN (RE-ENTRY)
3. I KNOW IT'S GONNA HAPPEN SOMEDAY (LIVE IN SAN JOSE 2014) - MORRISSEY (RE-ENTRY)

Only three months to go until our chart will be brimming with new songs.


Right then, let's get these pissy pants cleaned up.

Saturday, 19 August 2017

Day 2265 - On my radio

Last Friday I wrote about a photograph of a transistor radio that Morrissey's producer, Joe Chiccarelli, had posted on twitter. I had failed to see that Chiccarelli had also tweeted the words, "Mixing for radio. 50 years ago."

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On my last blog entry of two days ago, I reported that Morrissey had played the song, Just Couldn't Resist Her With Her Pocket Transistor, and girlwithout (GWO) left a comment saying that perhaps this was a nod to Joe's tweet.

Morfessa collared me in the toilets of The Wrong Arms on Thursday morning and whispered, "Clever girlwithout."


Could it be that Morrissey is telling us that the new song, All The Young People, includes a sample of Alma Cogan? Or perhaps a sample of a song from 50 years ago? Is the song a nod to Bowie's All The Young Dudes, which is incredibly now 45 years old. Or did Joe have the transistor in the mixing studio to add some radio interference, like the sample at the beginning of I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday? I put this last question to Morfessa on Thursday evening, and got the reply, "Perhaps. Who knows?"

Image result for morrissey shrugging shoulders

Morfessa also instructed me to remove comments that had been left on my blog by Chuck, who had turned up to post some ridiculous theory about the new Twin Peaks series being linked to MorrisseysWorld, and to denounce Morfessa as a fraud. Morfessa also added, "Chuck is still banned", which makes perfect sense, as Chuck only ever brings discord to our small little group, and seems incapable of accepting that just because the online Morrissey doesn't behave exactly as she believes Morrissey should/would behave, then it can't be him. Morfessa took to The Arms to play Morrissey's I Never Promised You a Rose Garden, which perhaps Chuck and certain others should take note of.

Yesterday evening I played I Know It's Gonna Happen Someday on the jukebox in The Arms. Morfessa favourited my tweet. Morfessa doesn't usually favourite tweets of songs I play. Hmmm.

And finally, The Wrong Arms has a new resident DJ. I killed Fluff off a few weeks ago, and we now have Robert 'Bitchy Bobby' Neville (@geniussteals) installed behind the wheels of steel. He's still a cunt, but now at least, he's our cunt. Morfessa greeted the arrival of Bitchy Bob by playing Susan Maughn's Bobby's Girl on the jukebox - tart!

Wednesday, 16 August 2017

Day 2262 - The journey of discovery

The Mozziah has made a couple of very brief appearances in The Wrong Arms over the past few days, although mainly in the ladies room - it must be a bladder problem!

Whilst in the ladies room this morning, I asked Morfessa to give me something to write about on FTM, and got the reply, "But I have!"
When I asked what, M came back with, "Journey. Of. Discovery. Remember?"

Of course I didn't remember, I can only just about remember what I had for breakfast this morning, but thanks to google, I realise that Morrissey is referring to a comment left on FTM by Dawn Mist on May 4th, as reported by me on Day 2159 - May 5th.

The comment in question seemed to be no more than a pouring out of random dreamy words - many of which I'd never seen/heard before, such as: purview, caliginous, crepuscular and tenebrous - but as I re-read it now, then perhaps the comment contained a message. The comment is four paragraphs long, and is definitely full of poetic throw away lines, but the following sentences are for some reason now jumping out at me:

"The lost years are lost only in name only, save yourself the burden of struggle and embrace the lost years with me."

"The journey of discovery is a discovery of the most personal. Pursue the purview."

"The all fall and leave only temporary fragments of their reality. Things have happened and tried to happen again, almost but not quite."

"Archives once lost have come to our attention"

"A personal archive holding treasures not yet seen and not ever to be believed."

"Do you dare step from the comfort of the known?"

"I need comfort and a chest to rest my head instead of the hollow bed"

"Gratification will never come when we wait for it. Yet still I wait."

"An opportunity for untold drama and disaster is what I see. Do not forget that discomfort is either a condition of the brain or a condition of the thing less well thought of as a heart."

"I ride in aeroplanes; you cannot find the strength to mount a donkey."

What does it all mean? Is any of it Johnny related? I'm jiggered if I know!

And whilst on the subject of Johnny, we have now just past the 30th anniversary of the break up of the Smiths.... 30 BLOODY YEARS! I still remember exactly where I was when I heard the news on the radio, and yes, I cried.
Image result for morrissey marr


Morfessa's public tweets have been pretty few and far between. On Sunday, at 1.40am, Morfessa tweeted:
"Why tell stories? It's preferable to write your own destiny."

The time of the tweet, and other recent tweets of similar time, made me wonder if Morrissey was in fact in LA, but when I posted a tweet yesterday to ask if this was the case, he replied, "Oh là là!", so I take it from that, he remains lost in France.

Morfessa also played a song on the jukebox yesterday - Just Couldn't Resist Her With Her Pocket Transistor by Alma Cogan, which includes the line, "though there's a million girls in town, Johnny lets them all go by, his heart belongs to only one, and here's the reason why..." - is there anything to be read into these lyrics?

Friday, 11 August 2017

Day 2257 - "Fragile as a baby"

All has been very quiet on the Moz front for the past few weeks. It is rumoured that he is in France, with the new elpee being mixed at La Fabrique studios in France. A photo-tweet posted by producer Joe Chiccarelli from La Fab has perhaps let slip that there is a song on the album entitled, All the Young People, or it could in fact be the title of the album. There was certainly no such song title on Dawn Mist's list that was posted on FTM in June.

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And on the subject of absent Morrissey's and Dawn Mist, a new post appeared yesterday on Dawn Mist's website, slightdawnmist.blogspot.com. The piece is entitled, From Nowhere and a New Adventure, and is rather poetic..... well Morrissey is the Stressford Poet. Here it is:

Thursday, 10 August 2017


From Nowhere and a New Adventure 



Beg my indulgence, indulge me with your begs. Stand up on dead legs and leg it for dead. Suffocating under the berating hatred that we all have in us. Amongst us and against us. What do we become when we finally realise we are nothing. Do we carry on or do we stop. If we stop does anyone notice? We can shuffle off the earth into dirt and into space and nobody may shed a tear. Waiting for the weighting of our insignificance for none of us have any significance. Recognition is arbitrary and I am the arbiter of the ass-backwards human abattoir. Men believe they are emasculated by showing emotions yet they do not know that emotions are the masculator.  Previously they were protected by bully-boy bravado in a 'peaceful' project of proclivity poised in a prattle battle of perfection; little did they know we all have a presupposed direction whatever the promotion of solvent values. I am pained to pass on this precise potent snippet of the absurdity of the abused de-masculated but gossip is gossip and clacking tongues must waggle and snuggle on the grim of the rim of the mouth.  

Heroes blinded by their natural order. Blinded by the natural order of graft. Blighted by the incoming shipments of arrogance and self-doubt. If you miss it you have probably never seen it and that, I am afraid, is your own fault. I will not be held accountable for your lack of insight. I hold you accountable for the books of loss.  Petrified by the darkness and putrefied by the light.  Man's manhood dropped into the  putrescent mass of those in the streets. In the streets and never in the sheets. Sheets are to be kept clean unlike the filth and squalor of the mind. In the permanent vision there is gangrene sheen of the gangrenous cog. I'm not sure what I'm doing here just rolling over time like children roll over and die. All I wanted was a hearth and home in a not distant time zone but alas, NO.

Negation negates the needs to say no in a final blow of snow like purity. The only chance of escape is the early salvation you experience in the cradle even though in the future you will regard these as mere scraps of crumbs from the table of the afterthought.  Disgust is all we are after, distrust is all I receive. 

Yours,


Fragile as a baby. 


Hollow and decrepit



As heartbreaking as it may be for some to read Morrissey signing off, "fragile as a baby", it is that fragility that has made him the person we all adore. No doubt the new film, England is Mine; which puts Morrissey's teen/early twenties years under the spotlight, has added to that fragility, and the words to the piece above certainly seem to suggest that Morrissey is once again pondering the meaning of life.... although he is wise enough nowadays to realise that life has no purpose, and we all continue to soldier on in whatever fashion we see fit.

For the vast majority of mankind, that 'fashion' of existence is 'Work until you drop' - Morrissey has at least worked out that such an existence isn't for him. It really is quite bizarre that the human race has bought into an existence whereby you work until you drop - why is it that so few question this programming? Why is it that so few question anything?

On the subject of the film, I have surprised myself in that I have made no effort whatsoever to go and see it. I was the same when the book The Severed Alliance came out, and although someone ended up giving it to me for Christmas, I still never bothered to read it. I suppose if the film were to be shown on the telly, then I would probably watch it, but it is the real 2017 Morrissey that fascinates me, not somebody else's image of the 1976 Morrissey.

Morrissey may question the point of his existence, but for very many people, his existence is treasured and continues to bring comfort and joy.

[​IMG]
MORRISSEY 2017 - FRAGILE POET WHO CONTINUES TO FASCINATE

Thursday, 27 July 2017

Day 2242 - Connoisseur of the Arts

I am currently sat on the terrace of my holiday apartment in Maiori, with a glass of Prosecco and The Kenneth Williams Diaries - I don't often read books, but I can't put this one down. The similarities between Morrissey and Williams are there for all to see.

The reason I have broken away from Ken and the fizzy grape, is to report on a couple more tweets from Morrissey using his Morfessa account - he may be bored of Morfessa, but still she goes on.

July 24th - 1.15pm (UK time, although I have no idea where in the world Morrissey might be)
"Eyes peeled and lips sealed. For now. For always. Forever."

Today - 1.53pm
"Mistress of the Arts. Connoisseur of the Arts."

Reading The Kenneth Williams Diaries has reiterated to me just how important Following The Mozziah is; or at least will be in years to come. People don't write enough things down these days.

And now I must get showered and dressed for dinner. This place is heavenly. I will definitely return to the Amalfi coast.

Wednesday, 19 July 2017

Day 2234 - Done and dusted

Despite Morrissey stating that he is bored of Morfessa, the twitter account has remained live, and on Monday 19th July at 11.25pm Rome time, he tweeted, "Done and dusted", which I presume is a reference to the new LP; especially as producer Joe Chiccarelli tweeted on Sunday that he was, "packing up from my Roman Holiday."

Morfessa also tweeted, "Glisters and blisters. There is a sound. There is a noise." Perhaps this is the album's title.... or perhaps not.

I have nothing else to report, so me and my hairline will now fuck back off again. Coincidentally, as Morrissey leaves Italy - if indeed he is leaving Italy - I head there.

 

Sunday, 9 July 2017

Day 2224 - Checking out

Last Monday Morrissey told me to fuck off and went on to close his Twitter account. Later in the week he re-activated it, but hasn't interacted or tweeted much, and today he sent me a DM to say that he was bored with his Morfessa account and bored of me.

It would appear that it is time to check out of Hotel California for a while... or in this case, The Wrong Arms, so I have deactivated my Twitter account and will also take a break from blogging.



Thank you and Goodnight.


Image result for morrissey upside down


Saturday, 8 July 2017

Day 2223 - Manchester Mafia

Morrissey appeared in The Wrong Arms on Thursday evening using his Twitter handle @TrueMorfessa (which he has now locked to the outside world) to declare:

"Existence is only for fame."

Morrissey also tweeted to say, "Good old Mam", which was a reference to a report by Noise11 that Morrissey's mother had issued a public statement denouncing the film, England is Mine, although no such public statement has been seen in any of the usual places, so it looks to be a case of yet more sloppy journalism, with Noise 11 picking up on James Maker's statement that Morrissey's mother should sue because of the shit curtains used by the film makers, and turning it into it being a public statement made by Ms Dwyer.


SHIT CURTAINS

Morrissey's only other tweet of Thursday was in reply to me tweeting to him regarding the recent incident with the police officer in Rome. I tweeted, "Nice to see you here. Have they run you out of town yet - hashtag villain", to which he replied, "I am the Manchester Mafia after all."


Image result for morrissey je suis

In other news, after two weeks at Number 1 in the Official UK Vinyl Singles Chart, The Queen is Dead has now slipped to No.2, replaced at the top by Liam Gallagher's Wall of Glass.

Wednesday, 5 July 2017

Day 2220 - Disgust

In my previous blog entry - written late on Monday - I wrote how Morrissey had suddenly gotten fed-up with me and this whole 'thing', and I finished by writing that he was the only person who could bring it all to an end.
I woke up on Tuesday to find that the Morfessa Twitter account had once again been closed, so perhaps he has indeed decided to finish it.... this journey I mean, not 'it' as in his life.... it would be a little extreme to end your life just because you were annoyed at yourself for being addicted to Twitter and a rodent's blog.
Image result for morrissey grave

We have actually been here a number of times before. Morrissey seems to get to a point where he starts to ask himself why he is wasting his time with faceless strangers that he doesn't even know or particularly like, and then pulls himself away, as if disgusted with himself; although for some reason or other, he ends up returning for more. This 'thing' is a drug.
Yesterday I came across an anonymous comment left on Day 679 of FTM (24 July 2013), which was a direct quote from Morrissey from the old MorrisseysWorld chatroom. I don't think that I have ever blogged about this before, so here, for the record, is that dialogue - better late than never!:

"The joy of MW has been extinguished somehow. In the early days, it felt essential; it felt like we were doing something together that was important, beautiful, strange. Now we're just reliving the past. It feels like it's dead and we're trying to get its heart going again, but after 3 rounds of adrenaline, it's flatlining. I gave all I had to twitter and I was ignored. I provided hundreds of Wildean tweets and people preferred Joey Essex and Katie Price. I spent thousands of hours on the blog, and people said it was crap without reading it - and that was just my fans! I don't expect mass acceptance but I did expect a few people to follow me. I got a handful. You were the special few, the home crowd. Yet the intimacy couldn't have been better. Had I had 10 million followers, I could never have bonded as closely with you as I did. It was perfect in that regard and wonderfully oblique. But it's dead. The time of the blog was 2009-2012."

Morrissey recently lectured me for writing numbers under ten in numerical form - bloody hypocrite!
Image result for morrissey sat hunched

Before closing the Morfessa account, Morrissey briefly chatted with Jaz on Monday night, telling her that if he were to make a biopic, it would be about Marc Bolan, "because it wasn't mass hysteria. Except for the small and little people." - incidentally, I only found out the other day that the stage-name Bolan was constructed from the name of Marc's hero of that time, Bob Dylan. We learn something new every day.



A comment left by heathercat on my previous blog entry, explains that Morfessa also tweeted on Monday night with regard to the England is Mine biopic. Heather states:

"Well, tonight we received Morfessa's own review of the the film. She appeared in the Arms to announce that she had watched it and died in dismay. Soon afterwards, she closed her account, presumably in disgust."

So for now, whether in disgust at himself for wasting time with us, or in disgust at the England is Mine bio, Morrissey has left the building.

Image result for morrissey leaving

In other news, having left the building, Morrissey has had a run-in with an Italian police officer  - he should've stayed indoors! According to nephew Sam's Facebook page, Morrissey was "terrorized" for 35 minutes yesterday evening outside the Nike store in Rome, with Morrissey telling Sam that, "the officer unlocked his gun and held it as he screamed into my face... I believe he recognized me and wanted to frighten me. I did not back down even though I believed he was about to shoot me. I urge people to be aware of this dangerously aggressive Officer. He might kill you." Sam posted a picture of the officer.
Image result for roberto ferdenzi

And finally, a number of news outlets are reporting that Morrissey is to play Italy's Sferisterio di Macerata on September 6th. If this is true, it will be another of those iconic venues to tick off the list.

Image result for arena Macerata
SFERISTERIO DI MACERATA

*Goes off singing* Ganglord, the police are grinding me into the ground, the headless pack are back, small boy jokes and loaded guns

*4.30PM - LATE UPDATE*

It would appear that the True Morfessa account actually re-opened yesterday afternoon - posting some new lyrics - but for some reason, the tweets didn't appear in my timeline (Ed - or perhaps you just didn't look!) Here are the tweets that I have missed, plus those new lyrics:

July 4

1.37am (Rome time):
"I have seen the biopic. I have died of dismay."

1.44am:
"When asked recently - "Why do you shun a biopic of your life?" My response was ignored... "That's not actually my life."

1.47am: In reply to a new tweeter called @theblueour tweeting that they would not be going to see the film, Morfessa replied, "The guest list will be thankfully halved."

(I don't know who @theblueour is, but presume that it is Chuck under a new guise. We just don't get newcomers anymore!)

2.06am:
"You feel your life has sunk to its nadir. Then you see your biopic and die twice in the depths of boredom."

3.26am: In reply to Heather pointing out that the James Maker link in Morfessa's twitter bio is wrong: ".con, is how I feel. James was integral to myself and The Smiths. He ought to be present. I can only apologise that this has happened."

Image result for james maker
MAKER - LEFT OUT

2.32pm:
"Potent sneer"

"Grown man reduced to childhood
Something psychiatrists never could
Kicking and screaming
Faults highlighted with no redeeming feature
A disgusting hunchbacked creature
Ingest some caffeine
And take what you can glean
From the overbearing screen
Potent sneer from the cathode veneer
Potent sneer from anode smear
Reminding us the past is always near
Nothing that stood stands now"

NB: Potent Sneer was listed as Track 11 on Dawn Mist's list.

Monday, 3 July 2017

Day 2218 - Seminal wisdom

The Morfessa Twitter account re-opened yesterday, with Morrissey telling Jaz that Track 14 is dedicated to her - which according to Dawn Mist's list, is Last of a Foul Brood.

This afternoon I spent an hour in The Wrong Arms with Morrissey, but a sudden swing in mood saw him go from being chatty and light hearted to annoyed.

I had started off by saying how I liked that Jessica Brown Findlay (Linder Sterling in England Is Mine) had picked a Moz solo song instead of a Smiths song when asked in a video interview to name her favourite Smiths song, with her saying of the song in question, "it breaks my heart". Morrissey replied to me, "I'm guessing she choses Disappointed?". I responded, "Don't pretend you haven't watched the clip - you read & watch EVERYTHING... for the record, it's EILS - good choice." Moz was having none of it though, and came back with, "I was actually quite Disappointed with her  choice. If it makes her heart break, for some reason which is beyond me, then it presumably must be for the lyrics. Therefore it makes no difference."


JESSICA BROWN FINDLAY - DISAPPOINTED MORRISSEY

I knew for two reasons that Morrissey would have watched the Jessica B F video clip because: A) Disappointed is the b side of Everyday Is Like Sunday (EILS) and B) he really does observe EVERYTHING, although he did add, "For the record I do not watch EVERYTHING. Don't keep a dog and bark yourself...". I replied to this by tweeting, "I bet even when the dog points something out to you, 9/10 you'd have already seen it", to which I got the hilarious reply, "That is what is known as seminal wisdom".

Image result for morrissey wise
SEMINAL WISDOM


I responded to the "seminal wisdom" comment by saying, "Now I've heard it all. I am genuinely laughing here", to which M retorted, "Oh? I have plenty more...". I then said, "Frank Carson eat your heart out. And on that subject, who are your Top 3 favourite comedians?". The reply:

Wood
Dodd
Brand

I asked Moz if he had ever featured Ken Dodd in a pre-concert montage, but got no reply.



Morrissey then paid my blog a compliment by tweeting, "For unofficial representation of Steven Patrick Morrissey watch England is Mine. Official representation can be found on FTM."

We then had a conversation in the toilet of The Arms, with M deciding to answer a question I had asked last Tuesday, about whether Justin Bieber would be featuring on the new LP. He replied, "No chance. My days of being a die-hard Belieber are over".
Image result for bieber morrissey
OVER

And then the mood suddenly swung, as Morfessa asked, "Have you nothing better to do with your time?", before then adding, "Quite frankly I am bored by you and this whole situation. If I were an alcoholic I would not be here at all."

I have no idea what prompted the swing in mood, but decided to return to the main bar, where Heather was suggesting that someone should make a film based on FTM. I joked that I would never give the rights, and that I was going to delete the whole blog. Morfessa picked up on this and tweeted, "Bluff and bluster. Delete it and free everyone. It's been a waste anyway.". I said that he didn't really mean that, but he replied, "I do. Waste and waste again. Waste. Waste. Waste." I disagreed and was met with, "Fuck you. Fuck your hairline. Fuck FTM. Fuck the BRS. Fuck off. How can I make this clearer?"

With the hairline under attack, I decided to leave.

Does Morrissey really want me to delete this blog of mine, to "free everyone"? Am I really the holder of the key to this Hotel California? I don't think so. Our Mozzer started all this, and it will only end if he ends it.

In other news, England is Mine had it's premiere yesterday in Edinburgh, and has received mixed reviews - doesn't everything get mixed reviews? Morrissey's friend, James Maker has criticised the film, particularly on the grounds that: A) there is no Morrisseyean wit B) The curtains of Morrissey's house are misrepresented and C) He (Maker) isn't in it! Maker has also taken the opportunity to mention his autobiography, AutoFellatio, which is out this week.


Image result for james maker autofellatio


And finally, The Smiths remain at Number 1 in the Official UK Vinyl Singles Chart. And now I have just one last thing to do...

Friday, 30 June 2017

Day 2215 - Gone!

The Morfessa twitter account has been closed - she has left The Wrong Arms. Perhaps she tired of imbeciles who were unable to recognise a simple Patti Smith lyric when they saw one.

In other news, a trailer has been released for the film England is Mine, which is due to premiere at the Edinburgh Film Festival on July 2nd before hitting cinemas on August 4th.



I have to say that although the film is no doubt full of inaccuracies, the trailer has made me want to see the film - and after all, despite the inaccuracies, it is about Morrissey, so what Morrissey fan wouldn't want to see it?

I would like to have asked Morfessa what she thought of the trailer, but no doubt I would have received the same answer that Morrissey gave me in that exclusive FTM interview in April, when he wrote:

"I already know how the narrative arch of this film and the various clichés and tropes it will delve into. The Morrissey character will be portrayed as a loner, dressed in a brown cardigan, drowning under copious amounts of literature who was destined to live with his mother until he died of old age at 47. The Morrissey character will be depicted as hopeless and loveless and ugliness personified with no hope of ever escaping his early-twenties exile until a youth called Johnny decided to knock on his front door. Why watch something when you know the story?"


Actually, now I think about it, that's exactly how the trailer portrays him; although it may be a brown overcoat as opposed to a brown cardigan!
Oh well, I'll still venture into Cineworld in August with my bucket of popcorn, if nothing else, to see the wonderful Jessica Brown-Findley, who plays Linder Sterling.



Image result for england is mine morrissey shirt




Thursday, 29 June 2017

Day 2214 - Miss Patti Smith - an apology


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Dear Miss Smith, you will never read this, but it is only right and proper that I publicly apologise for having criticised a section of the lyrics in your song, Pissing in a River. For me, a mere hairy-backed blogger to call your lyrics, "primary school", is quite unacceptable and rather laughable; after all, what do I know of song writing?
I also apologise for being a philistine for not recognising where the said lyrics came from when they were tweeted by one of your fans, a Mr S Morrissey of Manchester.... or LA or Switzerland or ?

I must confess that I don't own any of your LP records, just as I don't own any LPs by a number of other artists who influenced Morrissey in the 1970s, such as Iggy Pop and the New York Dolls. I was too young to buy the LPs when they were released, and I have just never gotten around to really listening to them in any great depth - I guess the truth is, I just never felt that they were mine. Does that make sense? The songs that spoke to me as an eighteen year old were by the Smiths, who are mine, and forever will be.

Anyway, I really shouldn't be so quick to pass comment on something that I know nothing about - I can be a bit of a gobshite at times, although actually, this is part of my charm.

I shall sign off by playing a Youtube clip of Morrissey singing an A cappella snippet from Pissing in a River - the same lyrics in fact that he tweeted the other day.

I won't pretend that I now intend to go and listen to Radio Ethiopia on repeat, but I do appreciate that you helped shape the songwriting of Morrissey, and for that, I shall be forever in your debt.

Yours sincerely and apologetically

Rat







 PISSING IN A RIVER AT 9MINS 04SECS
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Wednesday, 28 June 2017

Day 2213 - Yesterday when I was young

I don't have much to report since my last blog entry of last Saturday, although there has been a couple of visits to The Wrong Arms by Morrissey as Morfessa.

On Monday morning, Morfessa tweeted these 'supposed' lyrics:

Oh I give my life for you
Every move I made I move to you
And I came like a magnet for you now

As opposed to the wonderful lyrics that we had posted last week for (new songs?) The Last of a Foul Brood and The Test of Naked Male Flesh, these lyrics about a magnet just didn't ring true to me, and I let Morfessa know it. I got the reply:

"They are not my lyrics. However, they ARE lyrics. Hashtag Philistine"

I have googled the words, but can find no such song. I may well be a philistine, but I am glad these aren't Moz lyrics. Goodness only knows what song they come from.

Morfessa then tweeted:

"I dedicate track 5 to @slightdawnmist"

According to a Morfessa tweet of last Friday, track 5 is The Test of Naked Male Flesh, although according to Dawn's own track list of last Tuesday, track 5 is a song called Dying and Yet Somehow Still Laughing, so I don't know exactly which song Morfessa is referring to, although I would imagine it is the former.... although why a song about the temptations of male flesh would be dedicated to some old bint of a lighthouse keeper, I really cannot say.
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I found it rather confusing that Morfessa was dedicating songs to Dawn, as it has widely become accepted amongst the Dreary Deluded Dozen that Morfessa IS Dawn, and only came into existence as a twitter account because a certain somebody forgot the password for the Dawn Mist twitter account. I put it to Morfessa that she/he was Dawn, and got the reply, "I most certainly am not. I have more hair." When I then pointed out that Dawn had described herself as having thick white hair, Morfessa replied, "Dawn was an excellent liar." Could Dawn actually be Damon? I guess we'll never know.

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DAWN?

Morfessa also tweeted, "I dedicate track 8 to @TheRatsBack", which, according to Dawn's list, is the song  I Tried Love (In Order to Become a Man). Morfessa tweeted some supposed lyrics to it late last night, as follows:

"You tried love to become a man but your masculinity is torn apart where you stand. Hold your own hand and remain alone."

I realised straight away that these lyrics were a spoof, and tweeted to say I wasn't buying it. Morfessa  dragged me into the Ladies toilets of The Arms and said, "How dare you not buy my latest offering. I spent at least ten seconds on that". I replied, "5 seconds more than on Tony the Pony then", to which Morfessa came back with, "eight seconds more." I then got told off for my poor use of the English, with Morfessa tweeting, "Please remember that numbers up to ten should be written as words". It's like being back at school!

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I also had a brief chat in the Ladies with Morfessa on Monday morning, where I was told, "I have been waiting for a telephone call for over an hour. How dare they keep a seminal artiste waiting."

Half an hour later, Morfessa came back into the Ladies (yes, I was still in there... constipation if you really must know) and announced, "That was an interesting phone call. I wonder - could this be an exclusive for FTM?" I asked what it was about, but got no reply.


And finally for today, the mysterious FTM commenter, Ernesto Jones - who was the first to tell us that Morrissey had a new record deal, back on March 13th - has today posted some lyrics from Charles Aznavour's Yesterday When I Was Young in the comments section of my last blog entry. I don't suppose it has any relevance to anything, but I thought I would mention it anyway.

And finally, finally, FTM is currently getting more hits from Switzerland than from Italy.

Saturday, 24 June 2017

Day 2209 - The Test of Naked Male Flesh

Following the publication of Dawn Mist's album track listing and lyrics for the song Last of a Foul Brood, I decided to take a closer look at the titles of the songs Dawn had listed, to try and decide which ones, if any, might actually be real. I decided that No Human Sound could well be a real one, and so on Thursday, I made up some lyrics which I posted on Twitter. Morfessa responded by tweeting, "Barking up the wrong tree", but I don't know if that was in reference to my lyrics; which were about abuse, or about the song title being a real one.

Morfessa returned to Twitter again last night to post a picture of some sailors, accompanied by the caption, The Test of Naked Male Flesh, which is the title of another song on Dawn's list.

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Morfessa then posted this set of lyrics:

Rebuked for the evil that resides in the skin
Dissuaded from ever thinking of him
You shame yourself with smiles
Sigh and point blame at the sky
Past the steps on the parade
Where happy memories are never made
You leer into the window and
That's when you see him
And he's so handsome
And you're so ugly
And oh the test of naked male flesh
You tried your best
You did your best

About 20 minutes after posting these lyrics, Morfessa posted them again into my Twitter DM box, with these additional ones:

Rebuked for the evil that exists in the mind
Convinced towards normality
Now with downward gaze and face of sorrow
You've made an enemy of tomorrow
Past the steps on the parade
Where happy memories are never made
You leer into the window and
That's where you see him
And he is young,
Younger than you've ever been
The test of naked male flesh
Shut your mouth
And watch him get dressed

Locked up in your terrors
Hating and fearing every soul
Especially your own children
Because you failed
The test of Naked Male Flesh
The test of Naked Male Flesh

I replied to this tweet by saying, "I didn't think that title was a real one. I think you're toying with me", to which Morrissey replied, "Have I not been for years?" I tweeted back, "Yes, but I wouldn't put it past you to throw out a real song", and got the reply, "Well imagine if that was the real song." I asked, "Is it real?". He replied, "Is anything?", followed an hour and a half later by, "Track 5". Toying or real? I guess we'll find out soon enough.
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The only other thing I have to report, is that The Queen is Dead reached Number 1 on the Official UK Singles Vinyl Chart yesterday. I sent a DM message to Morrissey, congratulating him on his first UK Number 1. He replied, "It should have been Irish Blood, English Heart". I agreed, but suggested that he still should treat himself to a glass of something. His reply..... "A glass of what? Paint stripper?". Despite him not seemingly very excited, I have no doubt that Our Mozzer will feel some sort of pleasure.... but rather than celebrate, he will instead continue to brood at the injustice of Irish Blood, English Heart missing out 13 years ago.

Wednesday, 21 June 2017

Day 2206 - The last of a foul brood

Following the publication of yesterday's FTM, Dawn Mist took to the comments section to post her own album track listing. This was posted at 12.25pm (Rome time):

1) Sailors and Tailors
2) Love Blinds from Imperfections
3) Non-Negotiable Possibilities
4) Stoned and Alone
5) Dying and Yet Somehow Still Laughing
6) Grain of Sand and Impoverished Hands
7) Vanity of Nothingness
8) Tried Love (In Order to Become a Man)
9) Wet Slippery Slopes of Hope
10) The Test of naked Male Flesh
11) Potent Sneer
12) Latent Fear
13) Lames Cries, Emaciated Lies
14) Last of a Foul Brood
15) The First Shall Be The Last and The Last Shall Be The First

Additional Bonus Material
1) The Lament of Dawn
2) Standing Foot to Foot with Fate and Smiling
3) No Human Sound
4) You Promised Something You Could Not Deliver
5) Wasted Years Tasting Tears

DVD Extra of Dawn Mist reading A.E.Houseman

It is interesting to note that when Dawn writes song titles, she uses capital letters for each word, where as Morfessa doesn't. I reckon that this is done on purpose to make us believe that they are two different people, but personally, I'm not buying it... and I'm not sure that it's for sale anyway.
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Morrissey (as Morfessa) made one very brief appearance in The Wrong Arms yesterday at just after 7.30pm (Rome time). There was no interaction with any of the locals, nor any visits to the Ladies Room, he merely quoted what would appear to be the lyrics of Dawn's Track 14, Last of a Foul Brood:

Fed poison from childhood
Drip fed dead eyed abuse
Drop by drop and drip by drip
You can still taste the bitterness now

Never knowing how to be loved
And you always assumed that you
Were the last of a foul brood

Fed abuse from boyhood
Castigated and upbraided
Dripping in cruelty

Poor infant flowers destroyed
By adult hands before they could bloom
And you always assumed that you
Were the last of a foul brood

You used to dream of love but
Now you know you were made for the grave
As you're the last of a foul brood

Mocked by god so you laugh at man
Now you run with coat billowing in the wind
The last of a foul brood

No doubt this is yet another spoof set of lyrics, but I have to say, I really do LOVE them, and could seriously see it as a Moz song.
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I decided to have a go at making up some song titles of my own, and managed to reel off 11 of them within about 30 seconds - it's easy. Dawn responded to my titles saying:

"OM has instructed me to inform you that he is howling at your incompetence. Both at song titles and your journalistic endeavours.

Each man reaps what he sows and you have sowed sh*t."

I replied, "Hmm, I'm not the one who has to come up with a new masterpiece. Let's hope the old codger hasn't lost it when it comes to real titles and real songs. The world is watching", to which Dawn came back with:

"OM does not consider the population of Runcorn as the world."



Tuesday, 20 June 2017

Day 2205 - The fastest plumber in Manchester

As I lay in the communal garden of my bedsit on Sunday morning topping-up my rather wonderful 'Summer '17 tan' whilst listening to Hatful of Hollow, it suddenly occurred to me that Morrissey could greatly benefit from letting me listen to the songs on his new LP, so that I could give him my honest critique. I therefore dropped him a short message via Twitter's Direct Messaging service asking him to email me the songs "without delay".
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Twelve hours later, as I wrapped-up my sunbathing session for the day, it suddenly occurred to me how naive I had been in making such a request to Morrissey - I just hadn't thought through the consequences. What if I got sent the songs, and then someone somewhere leaked the album onto the internet. Who would get the blame? That's right, yours truly. I grabbed my phone and sent another message to say that I had changed my mind, and requested Monsieur Morrissey not to send the songs after all.

At 1.40am (Rome time) on Monday morning, I received the following reply:

"I was not going to. But now you have requested not to, I just may."
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This morning, at 2.13am (Rome time), I received another message as follows:

Track listing

1. Barbed wire is no cure for the truth

2. Drummers and accountants

3. Loathsome lawyers and lonely litigants

4. Mud slinging names stick like frost

5. Picking roses from the dozens

6. The fastest plumber in Manchester

7. Derma filler is no excuse for looking like that

8. Thump the table

9. Bed of distrust

10. Judy was a drunk

11. Intolerance of liberalism

12. There is no twelve 

Bonus track

Hair loss is nothing to be snipped at

The original track three was listed as 'Lonely lawyers and loathsome litigants', but I received a follow-up message saying, "Edit track 3. Should be loathsome lawyers and lonely litigants'." - Even when making up a parody track list, the man is a perfectionist!
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Friday, 16 June 2017

Day 2201 - "I must say. I'm rather excited" - Rome is where the art is

Morrissey (as Morfessa) returned to The Wrong Arms yesterday for a five minute period, between 2.25pm (Rome time) and 2.30pm, and posted the following:

"Bent on revenge. Bent on getting even."

"The mortal sickness of the mind and I'm never unhappy to be unkind. So I look at you and I wish you ill."

"Lay down in your bed of rust"

"Let their filthy voices sing 'God save the queen', an anthem for the nation. But we spit on the land we perish for. Then we turn to God."



To me, these looked like song lyrics - very good ones at that, but when I replied to the 'bed of rust' tweet, asking if it was a lyric, I got the reply (at 4.22pm Rome time): "It is not. It will not be. The strength of other lines will render this powerless."

I added that I really liked the 'bed of rust' line, to which I got the reply: "Well you would. You are already accustomed to the idea."

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A couple of hours later (at around 7.40pm Rome time), whilst I was powdering my nose in the Ladies, Morfessa came in and said, "Remind me. What was The Scenestar's password the other after-evening?"

The answer was, as Morfessa fully knows, "LYRIC'. This leads to two questions:
A) Was Morrissey in cahoots with the people at The Scenestar to issue 'Fake News', and
B) Are those tweets of earlier really new lyrics?
I would guess that the answer to the first question has to be YES, otherwise, where on earth did The Scenestar get that password from, and the answer to the second question must surely be NO... surely?.... I mean, he just wouldn't.... would he?

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Morfessa returned to the main bar of The Arms at 10.30pm (Rome time) to reply to an old tweet of mine, in which I had stated that I didn't think Joe Chiccarelli was not producing the new LP, and asked who was? Morfessa replied, "Dawn."

I'm pretty sure that I was wrong about Chiccarelli, because he actually posted a tweet featuring a picture of Sophia Loren back on June 4th along with the words, "Inspirational walls in my summertime studio locale"..... Joe's in Rome!




Just after 11.30pm (12.30am Rome time), Morfessa posted another tweet in my DM box:

"Plausible side"

I didn't see it until 7.30 this morning, when I asked, "Is this a song title?" and then answered it myself stating, "Of course it isn't!" Morfessa replied (at 8.47am Rome time), "Would I tease?" followed by, "I must say. I'm rather excited." And so are we!

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The teasing continued later in the morning with these tweets, which again look like lyrics:

"Are you a fool or a madman? Is there a difference, can you even tell?"

"You've written the story of your life and at the end you realised that you never truly lived."

"I am a grain of sand thrown about by an unknown hand."

Morrissey returned again later this evening to chastise those in power regarding the Grenfell Tower fire:

"Westminster elite do not care. They are safely tucked away. High rise horror a Ballard ideal for them."

"Death for no reason is MURDER"

"The establishment is weak. Freezer Clay will be gone soon. It's up for grabs. Take control. Take power."

I had no idea who Ballard was, but good old Google informs me that J G Ballard was a novelist who wrote a book called High Rise - hence the reference to him regarding Grenfell Tower.

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And finally, The Queen is Dead was released today as a 12 inch single and 7 inch picture disc. Next Friday, it will be Number 1 in the Official UK Vinyl Chart - the very first Smiths/Moz Number 1 single.

Thursday, 15 June 2017

Day 2200 - Titbits

Romina last night left a comment on my blog entry of Tuesday saying, "Morrissey is truly busy, all day long in the studio and just a little walk before dinner....shssss".

I now have this image in my head of Romina's net curtains twitching, as she sits at the window of her small apartment in Rome, watching every coming and going from the recording studio.

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Morrissey may well be truly busy all day recording his latest masterpiece, but he still took the time to briefly make contact with the BRS in The Wrong Arms last night, and I also caught up with him in the ladies.

At just after 8pm (9pm Rome time), Morrissey, as Morfessa, tapped me on the shoulder whilst I was powdering my nose and said, "It's almost more satisfying to direct message you titbits."

This was an obvious reference to my recent blog entries, where I (and others) have been trying - without success - to make sense of all the strange happenings of late. I am SO glad that our cluelessness is providing His Mozship with some entertainment.
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TITBIT PROVIDER

Moz returned to the Ladies Room at 10.55pm (11.55pm Rome time) and rhetorically asked, "Is there a third surprise?" before adding, "June. June. June...".

Ten minutes later and he was in the main bar of The Wrong Arms, where he quoted the following words from the song, Nowhere Fast:

"The poor and the needy are selfish and greedy on her terms."

Goodness only knows if that song quote is supposed to mean anything - yet another riddle!
As for the "third surprise", I think we've already had three surprises: A) the hint of a new label, b) the hint of a new LP, and C) the hint of a new concert. Could we be about to see the release of a single in June? Or perhaps the announcement of a full tour? Who knows? Who knows? Who knows?

Wednesday, 14 June 2017

Day 2199 - "Do you still believe everything you read?"

There are some strange happenings going on in Morrissey land! Here is a brief resumé:

On Friday evening, as reported on FTM on Saturday, Morrissey sent me a private tweet to ask, "Do you still believe everything you read?" I had no idea what he was going on about, and when I asked him to explain, he simply replied, "Everything you don't read."

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On Saturday morning, I woke up to find that Morrissey's nephew, Sam, had posted a mock up poster of a Morrissey concert at the Hollywood Bowl. With Morrissey's words of Friday still on my mind, I wondered if perhaps Sam's poster was 'fake news', posted just to see if everyone believed everything they read, but I also wondered if perhaps Morrissey had been referring to something else, such as the rumoured new record deal. I sent Mozzer another tweet to ask what he was referring to when he had asked me about believing everything I read, but again I received no reply.

On Monday, it looked like I had been wrong to be suspicious of Sam's poster, as LA music website, The Scenestar announced:

Morrissey will perform under the stars at the Hollywood Bowl on Friday, November 10. It is his first time back at the historic venue 2007. Tickets to see the former Smiths frontman at the Hollywood Bowl will go on sale on Friday, June 16, at 10:00 a.m via Ticketmaster. There is a Live Nation presage on Thursday, June 15, at 10:00 a.m. Password: LYRIC.

Pretty conclusive. It was on!

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Yesterday evening at 5.40, Morrissey eventually replied to my question of Saturday, tweeting, "Hollywood", followed by, "You'll see". I had no idea what these words meant, but had no time to ask, as I had a cricket match starting at 6.

When I returned home at 9pm, I read a comment posted on FTM by Heather (timed at 5.53pm) that Nephew Sam had removed his Instagram post with the poster, and The Scenestar had removed their article about ticket sales!!!

WHAT is going on? Is this concert happening, or is it not happening, and WHAT game is it that Morrissey is playing? Is this all about proving that people shouldn't believe everything they read, or is it a publicity stunt to get people talking about the concert, so that when it is officially announced, it generates more ticket sales? I guess we'll find out soon.

And finally, yesterday's FTM entry had the lowest number of hits since the very early days of FTM, when it was just me writing for myself. This has made me smile. Oh, the fools.

Tuesday, 13 June 2017

Day 2198 - Back to the Bowl

There has been no sign of Morrissey in The Wrong Arms since Friday night, but there has been confirmation that the rumoured Hollywood Bowl concert is going ahead on November 10th, so the excitement that had been coming from the LA Mexicans based on those rumours hasn't been wasted, and Morrissey will be going back to the Bowl for the third time.

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BRS LA MEXICAN BRANCH - EXCITED, AND RIGHTLY SO

I still find it strange that True-To-You.net is on the poster, when that website is no longer being used. What I don't find strange, is that Morrissey Facebook is also on the poster, even though Morrissey denied that he had a Facebook account. The reason that I don't find this strange, is because Morrissey also denied that he had a blog, and that he was on Twitter, but they turned out to be little untruths too.... not that anyone outside the BRS or DDD has managed to work that out yet! Is it too much to hope that just one of those Morrissey fans who dismissed the MorrisseysWorld blog and Twitter accounts as a hoax based on Morrissey's denial now has a lightbulb moment, and realises that perhaps, just perhaps...


IT'S ON!

Much as though I would love to go to LA, and much as though I would love to see a concert in the Hollywood Bowl, and much as though I would love to see Morrissey in the Hollywood Bowl, I won't be going. I will just have to wait until the tour comes to the UK, or at least somewhere a little closer to home.

Whilst on the subject of concerts, I must mention a thought that struck me on Sunday night, as I watched Rod Stewart conclude his headlining performance at the Isle of Wight Festival. I'd never seen Rod in concert before, but just presumed that he would finish his performance with Sailing, which he did. Likewise, when I watched The Pretenders on Friday night, I presumed that they would finish with Brass In Pocket, which again, they did - with Chrissie Hynde even making some reference about it being the one that everyone had been waiting for. The thought that struck me, as I stood there in that field on Sunday, was that Morrissey doesn't have that one song that most people at a festival would be waiting for.... and I like that.

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UNPREDICTABLE

And whilst on the subject of being struck by thoughts, earlier today it suddenly occurred to me that the words given to me by Morfessa last Friday; which I wrote about in my last blog entry, might, just might, be lyrics from a new song.... but then again they might not!

*Goes off singing* Do you still believe everything you read? And do you still believe everything you don't read?

Saturday, 10 June 2017

Day 2195 - No reply!

Any thoughts that I may have had of avoiding the news yesterday morning quickly disappeared as my Twitter feed started to fill with comments from Labour supporters who were very excited that Terrible Theresa had been humiliated at the polls by good old Jezza.



The excitement turned out to be nothing more than false hope, because although the Tory party lost 13 seats; which meant that they didn't have an overall majority, Muddler Theresa quickly did a deal with the bigoted Irish party, the DUP, and formed a Government before luncheon. What is more, despite all the media and the Labour supporters crowing how it had been a disaster for the Tories, their percentage of the overall vote actually INCREASED, which means that worryingly, they have become more popular with the British electorate than ever. The likes of Owen Jones don't seem to have realised this, they are only seeing what they want to see.

The whole British media and public are misreading the result of the General Dejection, because they seem to think the writing is on the wall for the Tories, but all that has actually happened is that the UKIP vote fell apart - which was obviously going to happen, as their job has been completed - and those who voted UKIP IN 2015, returned to the traditional parties of Labour and Conservative - particularly Labour in the north of England. We also saw some Londoners who are annoyed that Brexit is happening switch to Labour, but the likes of Zac Goldsmith got back in, so it all balanced itself out. Effectively, NOTHING has changed - even the cabinet is exactly as it was before.

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So then, as we were. Back to Moz.

Yesterday evening, Morrissey (as Morfessa) made his first appearance in the public bar of The Wrong Arms since May 27, as he came to give his take on the result of the General Election. I wasn't present, as yesterday evening I was stood in a field watching the Kaiser Chiefs, Alison Moyet and The Pretenders - all of whom were really very good. Morfessa posted three tweets:

"Diabetes Abbott was Corbyn's fatal mistake."

"Freezer May had her get out of jail free card all along. Hashtag DUPCoalition"

"First the banks controlled the government. Now the media controls the government. Keep voting until the minority get their way."

Morrissey shares my dislike of the dreadfully inept Hackney MP, Diane Abbot, but her constituents obviously love her because despite all her gaffes, she was re-elected with a huge majority. She certainly doesn't help the overall Labour cause, but in reality, as much as I like Jeremy Corbyn, he too will never appeal to enough people to ever become Prime Minister.

Diane Abbott, Labour's shadow home secretary
DIABETES ABBOTT - ALWAYS GOES OFF 'SICK' AFTER A GAFFE

Although yesterday was Morfessa's first appearance in the public bar for a fortnight, I did have a brief exchange with her on Thursday afternoon in the Ladies Room:

ME: Did you have a choice of Sanctuary owned labels? If so, what made you choose Trojan particularly?

MORFESSA: No reply! (A reference to my blog entry of Thursday - As Eric Morecambe used to say, "I suppose you think that's funny?")

ME: B*****d! Our relationship is so one sided. I give and I give and I give and I give.

MORFESSA: I've given you much more.

ME: I guess I can't argue with that.... I owe you so much... can I pay in monthly instalments? Anyway, let me try again, why Trojan?

MORFESSA: Why not?

I shall now give up on the label front!

Morfessa returned to the Ladies Room a little later and tweeted:

"Strange how the Facebook account is acceptable. Perhaps it'll close like a Twitter account."

I replied, "People would think that it was fake after all, and that you'd had it shut down."

I don't imagine for one minute that the Facebook account will close. It has now taken over from True-To-You.

And whilst on the subject of True-To-You, Morrissey's nephew Sam has posted a mocked-up poster on his Instagram account of a Morrissey concert at the Hollywood Bowl on November 10th. No one seems to know if this is real or fake news. The fact that True-To-You is written on the poster would tend to suggest it is fake, but who knows! It's certainly getting the LA Mexicans excited.




Back to Morfessa. I had another brief encounter in that Ladies Room of The Wrong Arms yesterday evening:

MORFESSA: Do you still believe everything you read?

ME: ?.... What are you referring to?

MORFESSA: Everything you don't read.

ME: I don't understand your riddles. You're going to have to spell it out to me.

There has so far been no reply!




MORRISSEY IN ROME.... HEADING TO THE WRONG ARMS


And finally, a very youthful looking, slimmed down, Boz Boorer has posted a photo on his Instagram account of himself inside the Forum Music Village recording studio in Rome, holding a photo of a new Queen is Dead 12 inch single, which is apparently being released as an HMV exclusive this coming Friday. No Smiths singles for 25 years and then we get two in two months. Lovely.

40211_boz_tqid.jpg


*Goes off singing* This happened once before, when I came to your door, no reply, they said it wasn't you, but I saw you peep through your window.... farewell to this land's cheerless marshes, hemmed in like a boar between arches...

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